There is a HUGE difference between being loved, and being controlled. Take it from somebody who isn’t a teenager anymore, it’s very easy for the lines to blur between love and abusive behavior when you think you’re in love.

They still prioritize their other relationships.

The person you’re dating should understand that you have a life outside of your relationship. Your friends, family, job, and school are just as important to you and your life as your partner. Relationships flourish when both partners are still able to enjoy their friends and social lives outside of their relationship.

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A partner in a healthy relationship will never tell you who you can or can’t spend time with or talk to. You should never have to ask permission from the person you’re dating to do ANYTHING. When you’re in a relationship with somebody who genuinely cares about you, they’ll understand that you need to do some things without them. In fact, a partner like this will also appreciate the same from you-respect their space, schedule, and obligations/friends outside of the relationship.

They joke about you, and you laugh too.

Maybe your girlfriend laughs at you because of your hat hair, or your boyfriend thinks it’s hilarious (and adorable) that you’ve had that same stuffed animal since birth. In these cases, your partner is just joking around, and it’s nothing you need to take to heart.

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A healthy partner’s jokes and comments will never intend to hurt you. If your boy/girlfriend said something that upset you, you should be comfortable enough with each other to talk about it. Odds are, they’ll apologize and never make a comment like that again. They won’t tell you you’re overreacting. They’ll accept their mistake, and learn from it.

They make sure you’re comfortable.

When it comes to getting physical, any kind of touch needs to be consensual. Even in a committed relationship, consent still needs to be given by both partners to engage in any kind of sexual activity. A healthy partner will respect you when you say no, for any reason, at any time, and they won’t keep asking you to change your mind.

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This goes for non-sexual situations too. Healthy partners will want you to be comfortable ALWAYS, and will never make you stay in a place where you feel uncomfortable.

They take accountability for their actions.

Nobody’s perfect. People should always be held accountable for their actions, and sometimes that means swallowing your pride. When you bring up a problem in your relationship or something your partner has done to upset you, they should be able to own their actions, and not place the blame on you.

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They take interest in the things you care about.

Your new girlfriend might not like hockey, but she’s still going to a game with you! Maybe your boyfriend has never listened to Billie Eilish, but he’s still down to blast her album in the car! A good partner will always be willing to learn about your interests, and will never put them down.

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